I moved to Brighton in April 2021.

At the time, it felt like a fresh start. Looking back, it was probably more than that. It was the beginning of a completely different chapter of my life.

Before Brighton, I had spent most of my adult life in Norfolk. I had lived in London and Essex when I was younger, but Norfolk was where I really grew up as an adult. It had been home for years, but by 2021 I was ready for something new.

I had been working for myself, and like a lot of people, Covid had made everything feel uncertain. I had a good run initially, but by Christmas 2020 business was tough. By February 2021, nobody really knew how long lockdowns would continue. It could have been six weeks, six months or six years. The businesses that would normally spend money with small independent marketers like me had pulled right back.

Then I got a call from the Marketing Director at Birchwood Motor Group in Eastbourne. She had seen some of my previous work and knew about the success I had with Triumph, BMW and Harley-Davidson motorcycle dealerships. She wanted to know whether I would be interested in a Marketing Manager role looking after their car and motorcycle brands.

It felt like an opportunity; not just for a new job, but for a new life.

Why Brighton?

The role was in Eastbourne, but I did not really fancy moving there as a 31-year-old single gay man. Brighton felt like the obvious choice. It seemed more vibrant, more social and more likely to give me the chance to meet people. It had energy. It had character. It had the sea. It had a reputation for being somewhere you could be yourself.

So I chose Brighton, arriving in April 2021 was strange because the city was still quiet. For the first six months, it felt almost like a ghost town as there was still a partial lock-down in place, where we could go out but not go inside. In a way, that was actually quite special. It gave me the chance to explore Brighton without the full chaos of tourists, crowds and busy weekends.

I walked. I wandered. I got to know the streets, the seafront, the Lanes and the places that would slowly become familiar. Pretty quickly, Brighton felt like home.

A city that gives you room to be yourself

Brighton is very different from Norfolk, in good ways and not-so-good ways. It can look a little tired in places, the seafront could definitely do with more TLC, especially when you compare it with places like Eastbourne or Worthing. But Brighton has something those places do not quite have in the same way. It has personality.

There is something for everyone here. It is creative, scruffy, stylish, chaotic, relaxed, accepting and occasionally ridiculous. That is part of the charm. Brighton is also a place where you can be yourself. It has a strong gay scene, although I would not describe myself as a scene queen. It has entertainment, social groups, events, restaurants, coffee shops, beach life, countryside nearby and just enough weirdness to keep it interesting. That mix suits me.

Moving here made me more independent

Moving to Brighton changed my confidence, partly because it was the first time I had truly been on my own. No family nearby. No established friendship group. No safety net of familiar people and places. Just me.

I have always been fairly confident and happy to talk to people, but moving somewhere new in your 30s tests that in a different way. You have to make the effort. You have to say yes to things. You have to build routines, find your places and create a life rather than just inherit one.

That was good for me; it made me more independent. It pushed me out of habits. It made me realise I was capable of starting again.

The sea still matters to me

Living by the sea has always had a pull for me. When I lived on Mersea Island in Essex, I loved sailing, going out on my boat and being near the water. There is something calming about it that is hard to explain without sounding a bit cliché, but it is true.

Brighton gave me that back. I love walking along the promenade. I love socialising on the beach with friends. I love those moments where you can just stand by the water and feel the day slow down a bit.

I even do yoga overlooking the sea, which is genuinely one of the most calming things I do. The sea gives Brighton a rhythm. It makes the city feel open, even when life is busy.

The Brighton rituals I love

Some of my favourite Brighton moments are simple:

  • A walk over the South Downs at Devil’s Dyke and then enjoying a hearty Sunday roast.
  • Sitting on the terrace at Soho House in the sunshine with friends and an Aperol Spritz.
  • Finding a cosy coffee shop after exploring the Lanes.
  • Rummaging through secondhand and antique shops with no real plan.
  • Walking by the sea when I need to clear my head, or sitting with a glass of wine and just staring out to sea.
  • Going for a drive around the sweeping roads around Beachy Head.

Those little rituals are what make somewhere feel like home. It is not just about the big life changes. It is about the ordinary things you start to repeat because they make you happy.

Has Brighton changed everything?

Not in every way. People might assume that moving to Brighton instantly transformed my gay life, but that has not really been the case. In some ways, I actually had more gay friends when I lived in Norfolk.

Brighton is open, but that does not automatically mean it is easy to find your people. Like anywhere, friendships and relationships take time.

But Brighton has still changed my life.

It gave me a fresh start when I needed one. It gave me a new career chapter. It gave me independence. It gave me sea air, new routines, new people and a sense that I could build a life on my own terms. If someone in their 30s asked me whether they should move here, I would say yes. Do it! There is something for everyone here, and for me, Brighton became the place where I started becoming more myself.